Tips to overcome shyness

I have received a couple of emails wth regards to overcoming shyness. Yes, let's face it, not everyone of us are outgoing and it sometimes can lead to dificulty in different social and business/work situations. Shyness can be defined as having difficulty creating a rapport with other people.There is absolutely nothing wrong with being shy but it can lead to a few disadvantages in various situations. For example, when you are in a social gathering(class outing), yu tend to sit by yourself and find it difficult to start a conversation with someone. If you would have a confidence to do so, you might learn a thing or two about others, things which might be useful for you in achieving our own goals. The same goes for those who are working. Your daily work life could become very boring if all you do everyday is sit at your desk and not socialize a bit(durng coffee breaks, lunch and discussions of course!).

Please also take note that there’s a distinct difference between being quiet and being shy. When you’re quiet, you know you have the option to speak when you are required to, but you just choose not to do so. But when you’re shy, you’re plagued by discomfort, worry, or even anxiety in social situations.

Here are some tips on overcoming shyness:

1.) Determine why you are shy.

Is it because you are afraid of being made fun of because of your voice? Afraid that you might be embarrassed by saying something silly? Once you know what makes you shy, it’s much easier to face it. For example, if you find out that you are shy because you do not know how to start a conversation, read a book or find ways/questions to ask people that could start a meaningful conversation. Find the reason/s for your shyness and take steps to overcome it head on!

2.) Step out of your comfort zone.
Let's face it, everyone in life would have to do someting that requires us to step out of our comfort zone at some point in time. Some more ofte than others of course. But for this case, you should go out and meet more people. Do not worry about the outcome. Just feel glad that you made the effort to say 'Hello, how are you today?' to more than 10 people today. Try not to think about what might go wrong but instead focus on what you can learn. Take baby steps. Perhaps meet a few people at a time each week.If you make the effort to meet more people, you’ll become more comfortable in every social gathering in time.
 3.) Smile.
Yes, a powerful action that brightens everyone's day. It does not matter where you are from or what you do, the moment you smile, you tend to look more approachable. And when you look more approachable, more people would be receptive to a smile and a friendly face. Try it today. Just give a casual smile to a few random people, (e.g the bus captain, the cab driver, the security guard) and see what positive reactions you get!
 
4.) Use creative visualization.
Yes, back to the powers of creative visualization. You can use it to overcome shyness but mentally rehearsing each incident repeatedly. Once you do this, your mind gets accustomed to the intended actual outcome and when you eventually do go out and meet people, you tend to feel like you had already met lots of people (in your mind, of course!) and you would feel less nervous, leading to better conversations!

Ok, have a great week meeting lots of new people! Hope to hear from all of you!